In my anger management classes I tell my students "your thoughts have everything to do with your anger." When we attempt to identify thoughts that occurred before and during an anger aroused situation, we find this to be a challenge. I am often told, "I wasn't thinking." On the contrary, there is constant chatter going on in your head all day and especially before and during a situation that escalates into an angry outburst. And, it is important to work on becoming consciously aware of these thoughts in order to alter them and change your thought process from a negative to a positive thinker.
There are two types of thinkers: the optimist who sees things in a positive way and the pessimist who sees things in a negative way. People tend to be one or the other overall, however it is also possible to bounce from one to the other depending on the situation and/or person.
When something bad happens to a person, feelings and reactions to the situation should be expected. These reactions could easily distinguish the pessimist - who thinks negatively about the situation and the optimist - who sees that something good could come out from the experience. The situation and outcome could be the same for everyone but the reaction and the perception of the situation is what distinguishes the positive and negative thinker. This in turn influences our thoughts and feelings related to the situation and our response.
A good example on how difference in thinking could alter the outcome would be the "half empty, half full" scenario. When a pessimist sees the glass and declares "half empty" his perception would suggest that the glass is not useful anymore since half of the water is already gone.
On the other hand, an optimist would declare "half full" and would see different alternatives on using the remaining water. The pessimist would go on complaining about the half empty glass of water while the optimist sees an opportunity and even a challenge on how to use the half full glass of water.
There are several benefits to positive thinking, one of which is the ability to better cope with anger. Anger and negative thinking could always be related. When you always see the negative side of things, you easily get frustrated which could easily transform into anger if you are constantly being hounded by negative thoughts. Managing your anger with a negative outlook in life will never work. It might even do more damage since you will never achieve any positive results.
On the other hand, positive thinking could help you soothe your negative emotions. By thinking positively, you could still see hope even though things could get bad and even worst. Positive thinking could encourage you to do better since things will eventually work on your way as long as you work on it.
Poor management of anger will never lead to something good. But positive thinking is one of the key solutions for proper anger management. Always have a positive outlook in life so you do not end up constantly frustrated and angry.
Daybreak Counseling Service
Shannon Munford
http://www.daybreakservices.com/
http://twitter.com/angryinla
855-662-6437
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