Often, parents dismiss an angry retort or rebellious behavior, considering it to be just a "phase" that every child goes through. While it is true that a certain amount of frustration is experienced by toddlers and new teens, there's a fine line between what is normal and what is not. If anger problems are not diagnosed and treated early enough, they may take hold forever and render your child incapable of fully succeeding in life. Here's how to know if your child is just a normal kid being stubborn, or has real anger problems.
Communicate:
The reason why most parents are a little taken aback when they discover their child has anger issues is because of lack of communication. Often parents don't even know when the child is frustrated, let alone why. This is not due to neglect or lack of care, there is just a communication gap between parent and child that makes the child form walls and hide behind an angry face. If you have been noticing a lot of anger and tantrums, talk to your child. Do simple chores together and talk while you do them. Ask him about his day, his friends, and everything that is going on in his life. This way, if there is something that might be frustrating him; you might catch it before the problem intensifies and turns into an anger issue. If your child is just a toddler and has been acting aggressively, sit with him and talk while he plays or draws. This might give you a clue as to what he is angry about, for toddlers can be very expressive when playing.
Be cautious:
While a little tantrum or aggressive yelling is okay; breaking of things, violence, grades going downhill and harming oneself or other children is not. Know the difference between ordinary, temporary anger and harmful angry behavior. If you find that your child is a little angrier than usual and is being moody and not eating right, give him a little time to see if it's a phase. However, if there is a lot of screaming and breaking of things, banging of doors and complaints from school about angry fights, get your child some help. Try talking to him and let him know that you understand. Be patient, and if you find he needs professional help, get it for him.
Get help from a professional:
There is no shame in asking someone professional for help when your child's happiness is at stake. If your child appears to be starving or hurting himself in some manner, or is breaking things and yelling a lot, try to get him to consult a therapist for anger management. Most children are so frustrated and confused because of anger they can't seem to control, they will willingly get help when encouraged a little. The therapist will then patiently get to the root of the problem and work with them on their anger till they feel better.
Angel Alvaro is an expert online author and a mother who is very close to her children. She loves to write about the various phases a child goes through while growing up, accounting her own experiences with her children.
http://www.facebook.com/angelalvaro88
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