Anger Triggers - How to Overcome Anger

Have you ever heard someone say "They made me angry"?

Children say this all the time, especially with they're siblings. They claim that they couldn't help getting angry that it was someone else's fault.

As adults many people do this as well. They give control of their emotions over to someone else so that not all of the blame falls on them. After all, who wants to be responsible for feelings like anger?

There's one simple truth though that so few people understand it's shocking.

NO ONE but YOU controls you. Every emotion, every action you take is the result of how you think. That's right it all starts in your mind.

For a moment imagine a bright spring morning. Birds are twittering outside, the sun's shining down, leaf buds dot the trees. Everything is perfect.

Now on this perfect spring day there's a man. He leaves the house not noticing the birds as he grumbles about all of the work he has to get done. His children cry out for hugs and kisses and he gives them with more than a hint of annoyance, warning his kids that if they aren't good for their mother he's going to spank their butts. Then he gets in the car and drives onto the highway. As with every morning the traffic comes to a near standstill, and this man begins swearing and banging on his steering wheel as his face turns red.

What if he'd made the decision to be happy that morning instead?

Being angry isn't fun for anyone and it effects everyone around you. Choosing to be happy becomes an exercise in self control and changing the way you think about things.

Everyone has triggers, things that happen around them set off these triggers putting you in a bad mood. If you can figure out what these triggers are you can change them. Now I'm not suggesting hypnosis or thousands of hours sitting on a rock contemplating life. Most of us don't have time for that kind of self reflection. What I'm suggesting is far easier.

The moment you start to feel angry, stop, look around and find what triggered that emotion. Then take a deep breath, suck the air all the way down to your navel and hold it there for a few seconds then release. As you release push the anger out with it. Let yourself relax. Focus on something that makes you happy. If your trigger was a person try to find one good thing about them, even if it's just their hair. Focus on that.

These triggers won't disappear overnight, but with each time you do this it becomes easier and slowly those triggers disappear.

Life isn't easy. But as you improve yourself things will fall into place. For the tips and steps you need to set you on the right path go to http://topselfhelpsecrets.com/

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How to Help Your Child Overcome Anger

Anger is something a child experiences very often, for anger stems from his frustration at not being able to express himself in a way an adult can. Children have a limited vocabulary and limited knowledge of emotions, and therefore most of the times when they are unable to express themselves; they turn towards anger to be able to vent and feel better. If your child is angry, it is normal, and with the right kind of guidance and support, you can help him get rid of his anger.

Talking always helps. Though your child may not be able to fully explain to you what it is that is upsetting him, you can slowly coax it out of him with the right questions. If your child is just a toddler who hasn't begun to talk yet but is throwing tantrums and displaying other signs of anger, watch him closely when he plays or interacts with other kids. The thing that is triggering his anger may turn out to be very simple; he may be having difficulty operating a toy, or other children might be pushing him or excluding him from games during playtime. Once you find out the reason, you can help your child come to terms with whatever problem he has been having. Help him learn that everything has a solution, and anger is not it. From a very early age, a child learns to understand what you are saying simply from your tone. Once you are aware of the root of your child's anger, you can console him in a soothing voice and tell him it's going to be okay. A child usually feels angry because of helplessness, and your reassurance is what will calm him down and help him feel less angry.

There may be a number of reasons why your child may feel angry. When this happens and he breaks things or tries to pull at his hair or bang his head, stop him. Tell him know that breaking things and hurting himself is not okay, but also let him know that it's okay to be angry, and tell him that even grownups experience anger. Let him know you understand his point of view, say things like "I know you lost your toy and it makes you angry, I would feel angry too. But it's not okay to hurt yourself or others." Once a child knows that what he is feeling is ordinary and nothing to be scared of, his frustration will ease. Often, the reason a child is angry is simply because things aren't making sense to him. Teach your child ways to safely let out his anger when he needs to, he can kick around a football till he feels less angry.

Angel Alvaro is an expert online author and a mother who is very close to her children. She loves to write about the various phases a child goes through while growing up, accounting her own experiences with her children.

http://www.facebook.com/angelalvaro88

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